Today, on Weibo (China’s answer to Twitter) they are saying that Kim Jong Un was killed in Beijing. I know this because I read it on Gawker. I refuse to believe it because one country cannot possibly withstand another onslaught of fake tears like those shed for Dear Leader KJU’s Pops, Kim Jong-Il. Also, are people going to be punished if their displays of fake grief aren’t as convincing as they were for KJI? I am getting way ahead of myself here, but you know, a superfan’s mind travels fast when there are so many unanswered questions.
I’m keeping this short and sweet until I have some more “evidence”. If I had a glass coffin making business in Pyongyang, I’d be polishing up a plus sized model for Jr., that’s for sure.